I don't know if it's protection or something programmed into me like Leslie & The Pixies said. I just don't get it.

Things got bad, this nameless alter self injured (had to go to the clinic) and wrote down in red sharpie, "I know what you're thinking."

I don't know what I'm thinking but I feel like I'm being silenced (not that I'm trying to say anything) by myself, it scares me. I'm not happy about the self-injury and I'm scared to be left alone, but I hate having to be watched at the same time. I feel like a monster or something and I don't need this on the eve of some not-so-good medical news. I don't like to be weak on myself but come on, I can't deal with myself- how am I supposed to deal with all of us?

Looking into getting a T, very thankful for my girlfriend Kate to do almost all of the work these days, including helping me find one.

I just don't know how to deal with this. I'm scared for my health. I'm scared of the notes this alter writes, violent ugly scary notes.