Trigger icon on this coz it's heavy ok? So please DO NOT read if in bad place...please DO NOT read if trigged by child abuse or mention of knives ok?












Ok, it don't matter why this memory is so hard in my head tonite...to me it just matters that i can't handle it and i know i'm at risk of doing something stupid over it if i don't "scream" it out!

The mention of knives in relation to children....brought this hurt back up....from when i was a toddler...weak it still makes me cry and scared...but my dumbass father tried to kill me with a knife when i was toddler...only my birth Mom stepping between saved me. I was a toddler ffs and he SERIOUSLY wanted to stab me to death for being devils daughter, satans spawn, born evil.

Sorry but i still cry when that memory surfaces....all i ever done wrong was be born to a sick %#@&#! father for god sakes.



That bastard gave me every torture in the book from birth to eleven for what? And no offense to anybody but when i say torture i mean it! Anybody here ever seen movie called Sybil? No offense again but i didn't totally get that movie when i first saw it coz....the things that bastard done were worse than that movie.

and scuse my language tonite but... %#@&#! it!!!