ok so here is some food for thought.

at what point am i lowering my own standards in order to accept what another person would call 'working on the relationship?'

so most of you who keep up with my post know whats up with my situation (if you don't feel free to browse through my posts via my profile). after coming home from work last week my wife left her email open and i found MORE 'pictures' sent to her from a guy she has know for a while in her email.

i was upset to say the least. it's been a long year of events with her. i can't say i've been the perfect angel either, in fact i really never protest perfection on my part at all.

she keeps saying 'we have to decide to dig in both our heals and make this work, or decide to walk away' - BUT the more i dig my heals in the more it seems that i have to prepare myself to be hurt again, and it seems that events are getting closer together rather than farther apart. i now function in 'damage control mode' almost 24/7 in anticipation of the next event.

and by writing all of this it seems that i am almost answering my own questions.

i get paid this weekend. i've found a place looking for someone to rent a room for a reasonable rate. good people. now i have to decide to do it or not.