T called this morning. (I have to admit that while I was talking to him, I had an image of "pocket T" flash through my mind a few times and it made me want to giggle ).

Talking to him helped. He's so good at untangling the jumble of thoughts and feelings that are bouncing around in my head, and helping me see in more simple terms what's going on. I wish I could do that on my own...maybe that's part of the point of my therapy, learning to do that. I don't know.

He gave me permission to not get caught in the feelings today. When I feel a feeling that scares me, I'm supposed to look at it just long enough to identify it (or try to identify it, I'm not very good at that), and then put it in my container in his office and move on. He said that all of the "old messages" will try to grab me, because they don't want to be replaced. But I'm supposed to stick my tongue out at them, say "nyah, nyah, I'm getting close to you", and ignore them. Will this work? I have NO idea. But I like the idea of it.

And then tomorrow, Little Me will go to therapy and play and be sent off on vacation.

I think I feel better. I feel cared for. That feels good.