Oh, gosh, Agony, I really feel for you in this situation. It's hard to bellieve your mother would be attached to this older man, who is so controlling, doesn't like children, and doesn't support her. What in the world is your mother thinking???? She will regret bonding with this man later in life, if she doesn't do so very soon!
But YOU are right to take care of yourself and your own family first.
Love
Patty