Hi,
Wow for a moment there this post could have been about me... 100%... at least until the "siblings" I was sure you knew me. Lol.
And here's the thing... I am also DID... my mom is something... DID or something.... and I do end up taking care of her. I have been told time and time again that I am only ENABLING her. She's a grown woman, and she makes her self the child to have me be the mom. I know, cuz I'm DID. I know that in any given situation, there are alters that can take over. I've now lived with my mom for 10 years. I have no life. I also now have a very good care team walking me step by step towards health including being away from mom. She's 68, she can live life on her own. She doesn't want me to think that and when I make feeble attempts to get out, she hooks me back in with her depression, fears, reasons why I will fail, suddenly get hurt or get in an accident.... the list goes on... and i get reeled right back in. SO! Now this time is my chance!!!! Only because i do have such a good team, and I also have PC where I can see what other ppl's lives look like. All three doctors and my case worker are determined that if i WANT it (which I do) that I will have freedom from this situation so i can finally be able to do the rest of the healing work i need. And mom? She has to learn to stand on her own two feet. Thankfully for me, I have no siblings making me feel gulity... only about 5 child alters But I think that this will finally work and I can break the chains that bind me here.
Your friend's got to want it. You can't do it for her - but it is good of you to seek out info. She has to choose; she can either sacrifice her life to her mom, or she can stop enabling her mom and let them both seek out their lives. Easier said than done - lord how I know.
Best,
Kiya