Well I reckon T is being held hostage in the Columbian jungle LOL, I've obviously been swinging from one reason to another why no reply. At the bottom of my wondering is the concrete truth, that T isn't going to be playing games and isn't ignoring me or teaching me a lesson, this tells me more about my life and my thinking then it does T.

I went to a Boot sale (yard sale) with hubbywubby this morning and of course my mind was stuck thinking and wondering exactly where may be. But its good practice for my head because I'm having to help myself here, I'm having to witness myself torturing myself and then I'm having to go in to that strange place located someplace in my skull and rescue me.

Its the knowing that I'm adult and seperate from T and the reality of the relationship that I detest having to deal with. Of course I am not 3yrs old needing to tug hold of mums/T leg, of course I am ok, but still, I want to regress to that place where I dont have to take responsiblity and someone else is doing it all for me.

I know I shall get a reply next week from T saying something simple like

"Dear Mouse, Yes It is a long time and that is difficult for you at this moment and I would have replied sooner except some goverment rebels had me tide to a big coconut tree".

See you Monday 8th

Love ***