i don't think that i can stay in this area of care. when i first started working there, i knew nothing about renal failure. i was going through charts one day and realized, to my shock, that every patient there was in "end stage renal failure".....every one of the patients is dying. they might be in different stages of their disease, but they are dying. i was so shocked that i had trouble for a few days dealing with that. so, i probably won't stay in this type of nursing...nor will i work in geriatric or with adolescents. the seniors die and it's a huge loss ( to me) and you want to kill the adolescents.......so....i'm going into ER work. i really like it and the patients come and go..not enough time to get attached to them. if this sounds petty...it's just me. i get really attached to someone who is sick and i think that i'll be better off in an area where i'm not experiencing loss so frequently.

i'm sorry for the loss of your friend. i'm just blown away by this disease...xoxox pat