Internettie,
I'm sure sorry to hear about what happened in your group. I think that's just awful, and I'm sorry you had to go through that. I was surprised by part of your therapist's email though:
Quote:
Originally Posted by internettie
"I thought about having her apologize right during group, then decided that it would be better if the two of you were to talk in private with a therapist (or both therapists) present.
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I'm in group therapy myself, and that sounds really counter to what group therapy is about. At least in the group that I'm in, members aren't allowed to interact outside group unless they then report to the group what went on. That just isn't
group if two members are being isolated to interact with each other. I was also surprised at the phrase "I thought about having her apologize" -- although I
totally agree that she should apologize, therapists don't typically try to
make people do something. They ask questions that lead the person to think about their interactions and how they affect others, etc. But they should definitely have reacted when she said that, asked her questions about what she meant, how she thought you might be reacting to her statement, etc. It just doesn't sound to me like that therapist is very prepared to lead a group.
I like the preparations you've done on how to have an exchange about that if you decide to go back. I certainly wouldn't blame you if you didn't want to be there any more. And if you go back, tell them you need a safer environment where people won't say cruel things to you! People are supposed to be real in group, but it still needs to be kept safe.
I'm sorry you went through that.
Sidony