E-sort,
Welcome to the world of OCD. I'm glad that you're faring better now. Your doubt about whether you were "faking it to get attention" is quite possibly a part of your OCD. Along with compulsions and such, OCD is known as "the doubting disease". I doubt my own feelings and emotions often! It is so maddening! I'll think, wow, did I do/say that on purpose? If I'm not sure, was it unconscious? You're not alone