Oh Freewill... so much pain. I can't say much, but I hear you. And - about many things - I can relate.

Go easy on yourself. I tell myself.... I did the best I could with what I had at the time. As I learn more I can do things differently, and make better choices for myself, but at other times of my life I simply did the best I could with what I had. No more, no less.

I hear you on the lying thing too. That is such a big thing for us, Sometimes we can say nothing, for everything that is said is made a lie by another. Sometimes finding anything we can hold on to as truth is such a struggle.

Go easy on you, Freewill.