Hi brmabr and welcome to PC.

What you explain sounds quite frustrating for you...I would feel the same way I'm sure. I hear you loud and clear that you want your marriage to be a marriage and a life, not a theraputic relationship with your wife.

In her zest to want to be a good therapist, she may be overstepping her boundaries with you. I'm sure her intent is good, but I can well imagine how difficult it can be for you to be on the receiving end of her "help".

Could you ask her nicely to leave her "therapist" duties checked at the door when she comes home? Let her know you love her and want to have a good marriage but to be constantly analyzed by her makes you feel uncomfortable at the least.

Maybe asking her to write down that which she thinks you need specific help on instead of bringing it up in conversation. This gives you the opportunity to look over the list, think about it in your time, and if there is a problem you feel needs to be worked on, you can then acquire your own therapist (someone you find on your own) to help you work through your issues. Until that time, you have every right to insist on boundaries when it comes to your wife analyzing you. I can't imagine how difficult that must be for you.

I wish you both well!


sabby