(((((((((((((DEAR EARTHMAMA, BIPOLAR BEAR AND MINIME))))))))))))))

THANKS. YOU ARE ALL SO KIND TO ME/US AND I APPRECIATE IT. I FLIPPED OUT OVER MY HELPLESSNESS ON THE SILLY COMPUTER, BUT I FINALLY REALIZED I WAS ALSO REALLY ANGRY OVER FEELING HELPLESS TO HELP MY DAUGHTER. SHE'S TEACHING HER FIRST YEAR OF SPECIAL ED AND LANDED IN A MOST DIFFICULT POSITION. HER DAD, MY SPOUSE IS SUPER-COMPETENT AND PERFORMANCE BASED AND SARAH EXPECTED TOO MUCH FROM HERSELF AND CRASHED AND BURNED AND THOUGHT SHE WAS HAVING A BREAKDOWN - SHE'S GETTING AN ALTERNATIVE CERTIFICATE SO SHE ISN'T FULLY EDUCATED FOR WHAT SHE'S DOING SO SHE IS BEHIND THE LEARNING CURVE FOR REAL. BUT WHEN SHE CRASHED SHE WAS AFRAID SHE WAS BECOMING LIKE ME.

NOTHING PUSHES MY BUTTONS HARDER THAN THE CONCERN OF HOW MY DYSFUNCTION AND PAIN AND DID HAVE AFFECTED MY PRECIOUS CHILDREN. I WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING FOR THIS TO STOP IN MY GENERATION SO MY CHILDREN HAVE FREEDOM TO HAVE ONLY REGULAR TYPE PROBLEMS. THE SATANISTS NEVER TOUCHED MY BABIES AND I DO THANK GOD FOR THAT, BUT I DO KNOW THEY HAD SOME INSECURITIES WITH A MOM WHO SWITCHED BACK AND FORTH AROUND THEM ALL THE TIME. IT MUST HAVE BEEN PRETTY WEIRD SOME DAYS.

I'LL STOP NOW, BUT THANK YOU AGAIN FOR ALL THE KINDNESS TO MY LITTLES LAST POSTS. MY ANGER IS ALWAYS ON A TRIGGER AND IT IS HARD TO HANDLE IT APPROPRIATELY BECAUSE BY THE TIME IT POPS OUT IT IS REALLY EXTREME.

BIG HUGS TO ALL OF YOU AND MUCH APPRECIATION TOO. I LOVE YOU!

LESLIE, WRITING FOR HERSELF AND RACHEL AND JANE

PS THANKS FOR THE SUGGESTIONS I THINK MINIME'S MIGHT BE ONE I CAN FOLLOW!