I wasn't here when all that went down and I'm glad. That thread could have been taken a dozen ways, but primarily I think the main concern is that judgments of that nature become a convenient excuse for the smug and self-satisfied to not have to care about others, and that's the bottom line. No one who is truly in pain or truly hurting wants or needs to be judged according to that type of criteria. Now, for those whom the shoe actually fits? That's a "horse of a different color" altogether, and in that respect your list, Wants2fly, makes a lot of good sense as a mirror or a self-eval tool. But for people who really have not been of that ilk, yet have had to struggle with every time a legitimate need arose being treated as though they were, it could indeed be a devastating trigger.

Your talent as a writer, though, is intact and without question. I wonder if you could pen so eloquently upon the nature of supportiveness and the reasons to see the best in hurting people? It would be an interesting exercise and counterpoint to your "10 Items" list, and I'm sure, with your talent, a terrific read.

Attempting objectivity,
Mal