Quote:
Originally Posted by NuckingFutz
I recently had occasion to call on an ex of mine. It's been 20 years since we have dated. He's even been married and divorced. I am planning a move to his area within the next year (this is how we ran into one another).
We got to talking and I told him why I stopped seeing him. It was because we were having a conversation about feelings and he made the comment that he didn't like to talk about feelings. One one hand I figured it was good to break up because I don't see how 2 people can work together through a relationship without discussing feelings (even if they don't like it).
On the other hand, we are much older and wiser. I was thinking that maybe we could reconnect and I feel so ackward about it because I haven't dated in years. I did ask him why he divorced and he said he didn't want to talk about it. I thought that was fair since we hadn't really reconnected.
We are emailing and sometimes talking at night. I didn't realize I still had feelings for this man all burried deep down inside me.
I'll be in his area again in a few weeks and we may or may not have the time to meet but I'm feeling pretty unsure about things.
Since I last saw him he's built his own law firm, bought a house, etc. These things don't matter to me. What matters to me is happiness.
Should I pursue this until I'm sure it will or won't work?
Advise anyone?
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Wish I had the right answer for you but alas, I don't. I reconnected with my old high school sweetheart back in 2000, after maybe 25 years. Even left a wife to be with her. What a disaster. It lasted only 2 years. Then we reconnected again in 2006. Another disaster lasting a year and a half this time.
Since we first met way back when, I thought she was my soul mate, and still do. But over the years, she did her thing and I did mine. Hers being the traditional wife and mother to 4 kids, as well as being a secretary. And me? I pursued the life of a tattoo artist/biker.
Boiled down to her and I just being too different (her opinion), and her not wanting to compromise on our differences (my opinion). In her heart, she said she still loved me but the "lovin feeling" was gone.
Would I recommend reuniting for you? I guess that depends on the current situation for both of you. How does he feel about it? You gotta remember that you separated for a reason. And that reason probably still exists.