greetings, fellow katie!

it's scary to look at your post and being able to fully relate to it. i also met my boyfriend online - and it's weird that i was the one who first messaged him, i was supposed to be the confident one but now it's all wrong! i'm insecure and paranoid! ahhhh! how did this happen? - and am constantly afraid of him rekindling his relationships with his former ex-gfs (who are way over in japan and south korea!! crap, i'm crazy, text doesn't replace another person's presence).

the only relief for me is to talk about this to a friend. i only have male friends but they are very understanding. one even said that he was like me in his previous relationship, constantly checking who she was talking to, thinking every text she got was from an ex-bf... it's crazy, i never thought guys could feel like that too! (so don't feel like a freak, katie. it's ok =)

therapy is my favourite "cure" for everything (though it's not really a cure, it's more of an aid), and the wonderful folks above have given you excellent advice. i plan on doing some of that myself as well! finding stuff to do during the day so you won't be too preoccupied with what he's doing? that's a genius! should've thought of it myself. hahahah.

the worst you could do is read all that "catching a cheating partner" - i know all that stuff by heart and kidney and liver and man, it made me feel worse because i found all of the signs in him, but in a very .... minor way.

here's a quote from my favourite book, i capture the castle by dodie smith..

=)

best of luck to you katie!

(sorry for the long ramble - hope i didn't go off topic)