Thanks for the reply.

I find that if I (the person I am Carolyn) just talks about the inner issues that my alter holds or knows of to some one in real life... then she is more willing to let the subject go after twenty some years of hurting from it.

(ex)
Like when I had feelings of wanting to leave my husband / thought about getting a divorce, but never told any one of these feelings, my alter was more likely to suffer from the inner pains that brought these feelings of hate out in me.

But now - after telling my sister-in-law (last yr) that my husband and I was thinking about ending it, my alter has since let the issue go and I am no longer torn between two feelings toward my husband.... I am free to love him.

I feel like she just wants to be heard..... some thing no one ever gave us a child, not even the courts that was to protect us when our mother / step-father failed.