Hey Valbends,
I know how I am going to kill myself, I have know for years. I have always thought of it as an option. You know when the pain got really bad I would think "I can always kill myself if I can't take it anymore" then somehow I managed to continue on. "It is always an option," was second nature to me. Now it still is an option but I don't want it to be anymore. I guess I have worked my way out of the worst of it but changing the thinking is difficult. I can't help but think of it because I have used the ideation of suicide as a comfort for so long. It scary to me now. Guess that is a good thing, huh?
Carrie

<font color=green>Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.--Emily Dickenson