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Sep 22, 2008, 02:50 AM
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Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: east of the sun, west of the moon
Posts: 2,259
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 Cant Stop Crying
I am so sorry the pain is getting this bad. I have a saying that is so simple it sounds trite, "Pain is Pain". There is no real scale that matters except the one in your nerve endings. When it hurts badly it just hurts that bad. I wish that it were better for you.
I have found Cymbalta to be the first depression med that actually worked for me and it even helped the fibro-myalgia stuff as well. I really needed help and it came through for me. So, I'm really grateful for it.
I should think the point of these forums is to let it all hang out when the pain is overwhelming and just tell someone else how bad it is. It doesn't matter what anyone thinks or not, ultimately, you just need the relief of saying "the pain in wringing me out and jumping on my last nerve with hobnail boots and I'm contemplating acts of desperation and cookies! So somebody HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" That was just in case you needed an example of how to stop being heroic about your pain. No one with RA should ever apologize about complaining of pain - that is an enormously painful inflammatory process!!!
I have found that "contstructive complaining" can be helpful. Sometimes it is good to be the "squeeky wheel that gets the grease". In a general sense we are taught, appropriately, not to go around complaining about our troubles to everyone. However, when you have a chronic, inflammatory illness that is excruciating, that is a different deal. I don't know who all is involved in your medical care but if there is someone who is a case worker or something they may need to see if they can help you locate help to get the RA med you can't afford. Along the way I lost any sense of embarrassment about seeking help for myself. No one else can advocate for me like me. I'm the one who has to speak up because no one can get in my skin and really know what its like for me. ALSO, I discovered that asking often gets me help; I lose nothing by asking and sometimes gain what I need or want.
OK, that was my 2 cents worth. I've been in pain a long time and I can truthfully say that compared to your RA I feel like a small-timer where pain in concerned , But ALL pain hurts, fatigues and robs us of life. I am very sorry this is happening to you. I hope that something turns your way soon and lifts your spirits.
Gentle Hugs,
Leslie and the Pixies
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