I back.. in the "world" of having no control..... of having.. "slam/dunk" alter changes... with drastic... consequences....

It's been probably 20 years since I have been in this state... so did I just "flush" away 20 years of therapy???

Life.. is hard, very hard this way... the alters are so different.. and the host.. she will be in "hiding"... healing... for a few months.. I am taking care of things for awhile....

I don't know what to say... what to do... how does life change so rapidly?? and how does it not go back to "normal"???

I as an alter do not want to be forced... out... to have to pick up.. pieces.. to do damage control.. for the "all"...

so confused.. and... just "disoriented"...