Ok, been a week since I have logged on.
I am uncertain of my future but trying my best to deal with it in a healthy manner.
I get stuck in bad places in my head at times. It gets really dark. And the worst part, no specific reason for it.
I have had really bad times in the past and for 5 years was doing very well and not hospitalized. But now I feel like I did when I was really out of control.
I am back in therapy but I am not sure that is good either. Keeping the %#@&#! tucked away down deep has been the best way to handle day to day life for me.
I haven't cut in 6 years...although I have found other ways of hurting myself without leaving scars. And, it helps me cope with the crap I feel inside my head. And I don't want to stop. Because it is a good pain, it is a releasing pain. It helps me gather my thoughts to make it to another day.
I am confused. And I don't want to disappoint anyone.
But, I don't feel well in my mind.
HELP???