I am doing BTEC course, so I am constantly with the same people.. The only class I feel comfortable in is choir, or when I'm teaching people to sing at home.. Or singing alone.. Or.. In my singing lessons learning more techniques..

My tutor has been picking on me all day already and it's just like "Arghhhhh!! Get off my back!!" I wish I could say that but then I'd get disciplinaries and be even more likely to be kicked off my course..

I'm determined this year to put my all into my singing.. Whether I make mistakes or not, I can learn from it.. I will put all the effort I can into my singing and performances.. It's gonna be tough, but i guess I can struggle along with another thing..

I almost cut in college today, in fact I'm sat in the library now.. I wanted to cut because I went to get some food and as soon as m back was truned the "friend" that I was with had disappeared! So I had to sit on my own, looking around me the whole time to make sure no-one was watching me eat, because I hate eating in college.. And I just felt so alone..

I wish that people could just treat me as a normal person.. I cut for a reason, not for attention.. I cover up as much as I possibly can.. I should really talk to my boyfriend, Connor.. Maybe he'll be able to calm me down a bit.. I don't know, I'll see..

Thanks for your support..