i would write things down first... make sure you are clear yourself before trying to be clear with her. Your time is valuable and limited with T... make the best/most of it. If you are struggling and need help try not to write prose.. stick with a point list.. one sentence per point. Then you've got what needs to be said without all the extra. i know.. i write volumes sometimes and other times i know i need to cut to the chase.

perhaps it would be productive to have a conversation about ways you can let her know you need help in other times... signals sort of... and about you as a "pair." i have always found our convo's about "us" very helpful and productive. You can talk about not being able to talk. i'm serious. Talking specifically about the process itself is a good exercise.

hope it works out