We haven't met before, but I can somewhat relate to what you are saying I think. I have had an experience with an RN that manulipated her way into taking care of my mother when she was discharged from the hospital after a serious stay in the hospital. I knew my mother wasn't going to live much longer & wanted to go home, but knew better however was put in a place where I was forced into accepting the help of the RN because I wasn't provided the information that my mother was being discharged until 4 hours before she was...oh yes, we just overlooked giving you that information(a hospital full of lies). Stupidly, I trusted the RN because she was a friend of my mothers boyfriend & his daughter. It's a long story, but I know anger toward someone that now makes me know how people feel homicidal. Since reporting her to the police, I have found out so much about her, but I kept finding out the things she was doing & stopped things at points where the police can't catch her (mad at myself also cause would love to see her in prison for the identity theft she did with my mothers name. The anger of all that has happened has made it so I can't eat & was in the medical hospital for 2 months keeping nutrition in via central line. I had a psychologist who I found out didn't understand anything about what I was going through, & the psychologist in the hospital along with my own & my GP insisted that I go to an eating disorder treatment center for a month. Found out from them that it was trauma causing the eating disorder, so then everyone insisted that I go to a PTSD treatment center. I dropped my psychologist because I felt like I wasn't getting anywhere & my Pdoc decided I should be admitted to just the psyc hospital since I couldn't find any treatment center that could help. My GP was going to put me into the hospital to treat the dehydration & nutrition problem then have the hospital's pdoc transfer me to a treatment hospital. I found out from that pdoc that he would not believe that I had anything wrong other that anorexia & wouldn't treat me any other way so I told my GP to take the hospitalization & forget it, & I wouldn't go to just the psyc ward for help because I have so many specific issues that need personal treatment. I, like you feel like I should be able to take care of myself but my husband was nice enough to find a T over the internet that he called. We talked over the phone & I let him know some of the things I have gone through & that I feel like I should be able to take care of myself but just can't seem to get there. I think he may be able to help because I told him that if he couldn't handle any of the issues that are filling me to the point of not wanting to go on that he should be honest enough upfront & tell me. Like you, must be going through alot that he reminded me that if I was dealing with pneumonia that it is necessary to get the help to get the illness under control, then our own bodies can then take over the helping get better.

In most cases, the psych hospital is a good place to get help when you are in a bad place & it is necessary to get the help started so that you can then take over & work on making yourself better.

Don't worry, I have been in the psych hospital so many times I have lost count & am still dealing with trying to figure out the right way to get help for what I am going through. Enjoy your Easter with your daughter, knowing that your blessing will be that you will be then getting the help you need to you can get on with your life that you want. I must say a good therapist & constant daily help is very necessary. When I was in the med hospital with the TPN, my GP had a psychologist come in every day & he got more out of me in the 2 months in the med hospital than my normal psychologist got out of me in over 6 years.

You will get better & the more you put into it, the more you will get out of it.

Blessings on your future,
Debbie K