before I reply to this, i just want to share with you that i was and still am in the same place you are. I am a female with a female therapist who i really like and would like being friends with. I've had the same thoughts you've had and you can probably see it if you look at some of my posts. my most recent one to be exact.

The fact is, however, therapists and clients are not meant to be friends. It is unethical for the therapist to get emotionally involved with a client because that could cause her to make emotional decisions that are not neccissarily the best decisions. Also, if the therapist "took home" all her clients and their problems she would drown. Her work and personal life needs to be kept separate. That being said, it is a total one-sided relationship. Friendships are not. Your therapist is right, the same thing will probably happen with a different therapist because there is a reason you are seeking this kind of relationship. Going in to therapy should be about YOU, not you and your therapist. The point of therapy is to move on and have a healthy life without the need of your therapist. Therapist's don't judge, so don't worry about her "liking" you. It is their job not to form a personal opinion about their clients. My advice is to work this out with your therapist. Why are you seeking this relationship knowing there are boundaries? Do you not have a support system outside of therapy? Why is the relationship with your therapist important, instead of what should be important- you. Is this a way of distracting yourself from difficult things you could be talking about with your therapist?

All these questions are worth exploring. Since you already have such a close relationship with your T, she is the perfect person to explore this with. It is normal to wonder about your therapist outside of the office, because there is a limitation as to how much you can know about her. So of course you would be curious. However, it shouldn't run your life.

Think about it. And I will try taking my own advice, too.