|
Sep 29, 2008, 01:23 AM
|
 |
|
|
Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: east of the sun, west of the moon
Posts: 2,259
|
|
 ((((kiya))))
looks like things have been a scary-go-round these past few days.
i wish i had been able to be supportive when it was much harder. i had a very busy weekend for me. i actually went shopping with my two daughters and had fun...gasp..shock!!!
i have discovered some of the programming inside me said i was not supposed to have fun or enjoy anything. bit by bit this kind of thing is changing for me. i used to not know that some of my system was set up to punish me and make me feel bad all the time. i just thought i was so bad and rotten.
now i often can remember that is NOT true. i am not a bad person and i do not deserve to be punished all the time and all happy things spoiled for me.
it sounds so weird,but it was a challenge for me to have fun with my precious daughters. i feel angry toward the abusers who trained my mind - as a little girl - to think so wrongly about life and myself. they were very, very bad people.
sorry to go on so long, but when i saw you mention doing some si to yourself this weekend it made me feel sad for you and for me. i used to hurt myself from as young as age 7 or 8. i did not deserve that, nor do you.
you are a precious person like my daughters and you deserve good and kind and fun experiences and someday you will agree and be able to have them. gentle hugs, kiya
leslie and her pixies
__________________
 HEALING HAPPENS
|