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Thunder, how awful for you! Your substance abuse probably kept the anxiety under control (self-medicating). You had a very traumatic upbringing but now you are safe. This is the key to getting better, getting your mind to see and feel the present and to emotionally let the past go (not just "get over it") but working through it in therapy.
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Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........
I'm an ISFJ
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