My T thinks I need to leave my hubby. She say's he is controlling,verbally abusive. You see I believe what he say's and then I start to hate me! I told T yesterday I wanted to quit T. I am so sick of trying and I feel I will never arrive and that this is my life and I need to just live with it. We have 2 kids 18 month girl,almost 5 yr boy. They worship their dad and for me to leave him would break their hearts! My hubby loves his kids. I know this sounds bad but I am his 4th wife. He is my first hubbyand before we had kids he said all his other wife's took the kids and ran and I made a promise if we had kids I would never ever do that! (HE WAS CRYING WHEN HE TOLD ME THIS!) My T asks me how old I was when I made this promise like she is trying to justify me breaking it. She say's when people marry they make lots of promises. I don't know I feel torn in a tug of war. Their are times when hubby say's hurtful things that I get the urge to end my life. Like I am not good enough and the kids would be better off. I know everyone will say DON'T QUIT THERAPY! I feel sad because if I give up why keep wasting the T time. She said it is one thing to quit if you are feeling well and think you can go it alone. But another if you aren't doing to well and want to quit. She asked me to keep my appointment for next week. I said I would. I just don't see how between now and next week I will feel different. All thoughts would be appericated. OH she does throw my kids in as my way of staying in T. She knows I have said in the past it is my kids that keep me here so I can be a better parent and learn new skills. Sorry so long. One more thing I am 38 and hubby is 61. He thinks I need to show him respect because of my age.