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Originally Posted by Simcha
There are some bad apples that are therapists...
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I am not trying to assign "badness" to therapists that I think are not doing their jobs as well as I think they should. I
do have strong feelings about it at times, but that does not mean
they are "bad".
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However, I do have to challenge your ideas a bit, because you offer no evidence...
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I think I was sensitized to this especially by my first therapist, who declared to me the last time we met that "I have never been treated as badly by anyone before in my entire life". That is, he (the doctor) was telling me (the patient) that
I had treated
him badly. In other words, I was the bad parent and he was the injured child.
I do think this reversal takes place to a lesser extent in many such interactions.
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as to why you believe that your therapist is trying to "fix" you because of your belief that he did not get approval and security from his own parents. What indicates your belief, other than his desire to be helpful and to "improve" his clients?
It could very well be true, but without any facts to support this claim, it is likely that it is simply an erroneous belief on your part...
Are you sure you aren't just jumping to conclusions...
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I may be jumping. I am
very sensitive, because of my history, to attempts to control under the guise of "helping". I think lots of people here share similar sensitivities. I find it
very hard to realize that attempts to control come not from a powerful person but from someone who does not feel powerful.
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I also don't know if your saying that most therapists have some kind of unresolved issues as a reason for being a therapist? Therapists don't do very well as therapists for very long if they haven't already learned how to cope with whatever therapy interfering emotions, thoughts, and behaviors they might not have effectively dealt with.
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I am not sure I said MOST therapists. I also think that some therapists can continue to practice and do damage which is not recognized by their peers or themselves for a long time.
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I find it very odd, and if true (and not a cognitive distortion of some sort), I find it very disturbing that most of your therapists have wanted you to take care of them.
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I think it is a matter of degree, and that I am very sensitive to it.
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Have you met many other people who have/are gone/going through therapy who have had similar experiences with their therapist? Have they come to similar conclusions, or are your repeat experiences unique regarding therapists turning the tables on you?
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Not unique, no. For instance, I read once a patient's account who said he was told by his therapist that he would die if he left her.
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I'm certainly not discounting your concerns, as it is quite possible that you got the run of the bad apples-- and in that case I hope you stop seeing the one you have currently before they cause more damage. What are your thoughts on this?
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I think I am unusually (pathologically?
) sensitive to the condition. I do not necessarily think of them as "bad apples". I think of them as being pretty ordinary by the standards of present day therapy -- and that is not good enough in severe cases.