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Old Oct 03, 2008, 01:00 PM
Lenny Lenny is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Feb 2008
Location: SC
Posts: 4,083
Troy, I have found that anger,,in my life,,, is fear under pretense.

My silly programming makes crying about or expressing fear shamefull and thus difficult.. So it gets expressed as anger internally or otherwise...Either expression is damaging...

When I find myself angry about something..or even angry without a specific something...I gently ask myself.."Lenny, what are you afraid of?"

If I sit quietly with that question,,and use self honestly as my mentor...I can usually find some fearfull illusion that is egging me on. Fear is not real,,it is an illusion,,though it can point us to safty...some fear has real associations.

But my anger,,which fear has manefested,,is misplaced. It is a feeling being born from a dream,,an inner repulsion to something that threatens me...usually imagined.

Fearlessness is a peace..a sanctom,,a feeling that all of what I am is in true context of my percieved universe. Whatever I have and whatever I am...is free to you or another,,without conditions or expectations..

By knowing this spiritually,,,there is nothing another man can do to harm me...no reason for fear,,and no mount for its mask...anger.

It has been my way for quite some time now,,,but I do slip,,,I become fearfull and wrap my inner hands around something that I believe belongs to me...it is silly,,,for everything in my universe is borrowed,,even this breath...

When I am in that true place,,,there is nothing more joyfull or free...in knowing beyond any question,,that everything is exactly how it must be in this very moment and that my place in it is as it should be...

Humbly,

Lenny
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I have only one conclusion,,and that is things change too quickly for me to draw them....
Sobriety date...Halloween 1989.
I was plucked from hell...and treat this gift as if it is the only one...