Vett,

I think you are approaching the bottom line here. Can you make it? Do you want to make it? Are you willing to make it?

Letting what has passed be the past is realistic and healthy. It is what she wants, and what you have got to let yourself see is that it may not be what you WANT, but it is what you NEED.

There is a saying about not beating dead horses... I am going to take it to heart and drop this topic with you. I just can't help but get the feeling you really like this dead horse and will try to ride it until it rots.

I just cannot stay interested with what seems to be your very stubborn (not loyalty) refusal to deal with reality. What further frustrates me is that I think you really do know all this and choose the path you are on.

Sorry for being crabby and blunt. My patient understanding mode is offline today.

Wherever you go, there you are