I'm so sorry for everything this entire family is going thru...it's so painful and confusing and distressing.

my first thought was "sharing" holidays as well. that's what most do with children of divorce, so it may have to happen here until feelings can become less intense (hopefully) over time. it's so sad that the daughters don't want to be where their mother is.

even if your sister isn't in therapy, have you mentioned it to her daughters to help them to sort thru all of the massive feelings that they're going thru right now? a good therapist could help them with their feelings. i would definitely recommend it. it sounds like they might have alot that they could work thru with a good therapist.

please keep us updated...the sharing holidays will have to be an entire family decision. i'm sure no one is going to be satisfied with it, but i'm hoping over time feelings will calm just a bit with time.

please keep us posted?

gl!

kd