Nothing too horrible in here, but I just wanted to be sure to put the TW here.

Well, I went to T and I told her how frustrated I am and she had me do a drawing of a beaker ( you know, those things they use in chem labs?) and had me draw sections in it that I fill up with my feelings from childhood to today. I didn't quite understand the point, but once all was said and done she said, "No wonder you feel like you do." She said I didn't even put everything in it, but that it would be full if I did.

She was worried that one of my alters might do something because they were talking about doing something to "end it all". She asked if there was anything for her to be worried about. I answered, honestly, and told her that I do not know because I don't have control over them when they come forward. I told her that "I" am not going to do anything as "I" am not in that frame of mind.

We talked about journaling more and she suggested I try some massage therapy (?) and I told her that I do not trust anyone but my BF to touch me, but I said I would think about it. I don't think I will do it!

Anyways, things are not as bad as they were last night, so I hope I didn't worry anyone too much.

Thanks for being here. I am so thankful that we have PC and such good friends to talk to.


BJ