hi, it's ok. I suggest you to talk to a therapist, couselor, if you're a student then a guidance counselor, your parent(s), or a social worker. I think that you need to think about all your good qualities and try to make a list of your great qualities from day to day to increase your self-esteem. Body image for people is a very difficult thing to cope with especially with all the media out in the world and how everyone wants to be a size 0, but the truth is that people should be in the appropriate measures of BMI (Body Mass Index). A size 0 isn't always necessary and you should take care of youself first, not your body image. I highly suggest that you see a nutritionist so that they could give you different meal planning suggestions about how to eat healthily and not feel guilty. I've personally seen a nutritionist everyday for 5 months and it helped very much. I am currently right on track with my weight, diet, and exercise. I think that there is a lot going for you to think about, but try to slow yourself down through meditation, deep breathing, etc. I wish you the best of luck. PM me anytime!