Thank you! Back at ya, and might I also compliment you on your typing!! I ENVY how quickly you just got that up there!!
And thanks for this... This was a HUGE "bingo!" for me! I only wish more people could embrace this concept:
"Well that's the thing... private people are private. Privacy requirements might be heightened when people don't feel good about themselves, but the fact remains that they are private and when one is depressed and their space is invaded with a partner who MUST KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON AND WHY ARE YOU PUSHING ME AWAY, then it seems to me the lack of respect for private space causes the breakup, rather than the feelings of depression."
You are RIGHT! These days I describe what I could handle (and who knows, I might improve) as a "long-time companion." Committed, but without traditional roles and expectations. Let anticipation of the good times carry us through the... inert times. I won't be actively upset or needing to endlessly bend an ear or act out or whatever, so what I really need and appreciate is someone who can pretty much pretend it isn't there. And also understand that it's an ongoing thing, and "this time" will probably never be the "last time."