I have just come to this realization myself. I was so angry at my parts and what they did that I could only think of tearing them out in an angry fit. Just about a month ago my, my T asked me to be kind to them and to try to understand what they wanted. This is helping to comfort and quiet them. They kept me alive for decades. I'm learning to understand and comfort them and the struggle has eased a bit. Your post was nicely and clearly stated. And it's comforting to know I'm not alone in this pain. Thanks.