Hi Melissa. I'd like to welcome you to PsychCentral. You've come to a great place for understanding and relation.

I'm so sorry for what you went thru as a child. I, along with many here, can relate with you and share your pain and concerns. I, as well, am a survivor. I want to say "well done" on doing whatever you needed to do to survive! I don't understand why people hurt children. I don't think I ever will.

It's no wonder that the memories, thoughts and feelings are with you so strongly right now! That usually happens when something life threatening happens to the abusers...along with other triggers. It can bring it so close again

I'm very glad that you have an understanding husband. Kudos to hubby!

Melissa, have you ever been in therapy and talked in depth about what happened to that little girl? It's helped me so much when things happen that bring that time close to me. Talking it all out...putting as much understanding to it as I can. The main thing that's helped me there is to attempt to let go of some of the guilt and shame. Also, I found out how much I react/act today is directly related to then.

Whatever you decide to do about that abuser, know that I'm thinking about you. You deserve to say whatever it is that you want to say.

Think about therapy? It's saved my quality of life.

Again, i congratulate you. I hope so much for you and yours. Mainly, keep yourself emotionally safe right now thru this time.

I understand what you're going thru. I know you would understand me as well if i told you my story...for that I'm sorry. I wish no one to understand the hell of childhood sexual abuse.

Be safe and I hope to hear from you again soon!

kd