Oh sweety, cutting doesn't make you bad or weak. It hurts. It gets to the point where it is an addictive, unhealthy coping mechanism; which means you need to develop new, healthier ones--it doesn't mean you are bad or stupid or weak. You are doing right by posting when you feel like that. If the urge is there to do something physical, snap a pencil in half, twist a paperclip, scribble on paper, get a soft ball (like Koosh) and throw it against the wall, weed a garden. I'm sure you've heard these all before, I just wanted to reinforce to you that you are in the learning stage of finding new coping mechanism--it's called "learning" for a reason: you don't know it yet, you have to teach yourself to do these things. No one expects perfection--you shouldn't either. Many safe and gentle hugs to you