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Old Oct 13, 2008, 11:01 PM
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skeeweeaka skeeweeaka is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 418
Quote:
Originally Posted by digdug View Post
Okay, so my wife just recently brought up the kids issue -- as in, she would like to have some very soon. We're basically at the point in our lives where we have to commit to this now, or never (we've been married 9 years, but we were very young at the time, so I'll let you do the rough math)...also, in 6 months to a year we'll probably be at a point where we'll have a stable enough living/financial situation that kids will be possible to work into the equation of our lives.

Part of me is really excited about the prospect...I've never though too much about kids up to now, as both my wife and I went back to school recently and have been quite busy, but now it just seems like perfect timing. But then I worry about passing on my OCD/anxiety/depression to some poor, innocent newborn. It's like when Tony Soporano used to talk about the "poisonous Soprano gene," for those who watched that show. The guilt of possibly passing my problems onto my kids is something I'm quite concerned about.

I was wondering if anyone else has faced this issue, and if they could offer my any advice on what to think/feel at the moment. I suppose acknlowedging I have these problems, instead of trying to hide them in the closet like my parents did, is a good first step. But I don't know how such awareness would translate as a parent...I don't want to panic and/or scare my kids the first time I see them worrying about something.

Please help me! Thanks in advance.
I applaud you for thinking about this and for planning your family...how excellent! That said, I think now is a good time to get some marriage counseling about these issues since you are concerned, or at the least, discuss this at length with your other half. Personally, I would wait until both of you are out of school because adding the expense of a child is huge and takes quite a abit of time and money..IMHO!

I, too, was very hesitant about having a child, mostly because I had not been raised well and didn't think I could do it, honestly! It is difficult, especially now that she is 12 yo, but I am happy that I decided to give birth because it was by far the best thing that I have done! Do I struggle every day trying to give her the love and attention that she needs and so rightly deserves, yes I do! But, she is so worth it!

Peace and Blessings to You...

TJ
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