Thanks guys. ((ice)) ((pach)) ((sannah)). I did deserve a better mother. I would have been such a great daughter. I love so much. I had a hard time sleeping lastnight. My body woke up tense and in pain and I couldnt get it to stop. I think its anger.My T's are so great but the anger things they say are for baby anger. I dont have baby anger Ihave mutant rageful seething anger. I want to climb to a hugh building and while the whole world watches I want to jump. I want to bust every single window in the world except for the people I love or with babies or kids or older people or nice people or sad people...sigh never mind. I want to just get it out. Im thinking a message would help except I dont do well with touch. But my body is craving it for some reason. The feel of another human thats safe and just sitting by me. My back is tense my shoulders hurt and my legs are hurting.