FLASHBACKS ARE WORSE THAN EVER.............they coming thick and fast feels as though come out of one into another..............tell self it not happening this is not right it is a memory yea right..........it ok i am safe.........NO IM NOT SAFE THEY KEEP TELLING ME THAT IM NOT SAFE .......KEEP TELLING ME THEY WILL BE BACK KEEP TELLING ME SSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BECAUSE IT NOT MATTER NOW.....IT IS DONE IT IS GONE.....................NO ITS NOT.l dont want to remember l want to lco them back up put them away but they keep coming and now HE does it again reminding me of the pathetic person that l am. SAY NO NO NO NO NO DID IT MATTER NO HE DO WHAT HE WANT WHEN HE WANT HOW HE WANT AND ME WELL L AM THERE!!!!!

I can feel the physical effects on my body it may only be a memory so they keep saying then why does my body physically hurt?????why do l cuts all over me?????why is my head and my body so out of control. why can l see them , smell they , feel them if they are just memories. why was l so stpid again why dont l learn why did l open the door and aloow it all again. Feel so degraded and humilated and ashamed how can l go tomorrow and say it was him when
IT WAS ME
ME I LET HIM IN
ME I WAS SO STUPID
ME WHO OPENED THE DOOR
ME WHO THOUGHT SHE COULD WIN
ME WHO THOUGHT SHE WAS STRONG
AND GUESS WHAT L DID WHAT HE ALWAYS SAID
I LAY DOWN ACTED LIKE L WAS DEAD
LET IT HAPPEN
DIDNOT STOP HIM
THE WAY ITS ALWAYS BEEN

There is no point anymore HE WON AGAIN JUST LIKE HE ALWAYS SAID HE WOULD