Hi Okie --

I agree with those who say to get counseling for yourself. You deserve to have support right there for you, as well as here on the Forums.

If your husband will only go to therapy because he "has" to, at least that is a start. I see it as a positive. For some people -- especially men I think -- counseling has a stigma. Perhaps he is using "will only go if I have to" as an excuse, to keep from admitting that there is a problem that needs to be handled, and he isn't sure how to do it. Certainly, getting the horse over to the bucket so that you can splash some water on its lips is better than letting the poor thing's lips get all dry and cracked.

Best wishes for finding the comfort, hope and help you need to sustain you through this challenging time.