Yes, Googling and Myspacing are bad news when you're feeling down...so far I've managed to avoid Facebook, largely just for this reason. I think almost everyone has done a search of an old friend or ex...it's the 21st-century equivalent to the 2am drunken phone call.

As for your situation, I really pity the two chlidren that have come out of that messed-up relationship...their prospects are NOT good, believe me. And I empathize with you for having to put with so much crap for so long...but believe me, you are BY FAR the best off out of anyone in the little soap opera you just described. If your ex and the new wife can be happy in such a screwed-up relationship, there's something wrong with them. And then those poor kids...

It seems like you have a good outlook...you were just in a mood for a little melancholy last night, which is understandable given all the other stuff you have to deal with. Feeling sad can be a release sometimes. Either way I wish you luck dealing with your anxiety and the issues around it.