we are all somewhere on the path Ziggy... ive been blessed with a juicy nugget which is really helping me grow... try it if you like it, if not, its not meant for you, but i am greatly pleased to hear of the progress you are having... we arent very dis-similar ive noted in reading a few of your postings... i really dont think you're a bad guy at all and i wanted to tell you that... recovery is hard... you will be ok...

in recovery, the depth of our sincerity determines the level of any reward...

blessings always Zig