i been trying not to go to the chats since they dont help and feel very little bit better. friday i got meeting with supported living program and it is a 25 year old female and she is really nice. i felt some happiness with her, but feel uneasy with her too. i need to be with someone so much and when i was with her it was so wonderful, but after she left and as i write, i'm so sad and lonely and just want to be with her. it is uncomfortable, but as a human i need that closeness with another. i miss her so much.