Luce - everything in your post made sense - to the point exactly. perhaps this will pass again. but having to reassess this every year...every month, every day... gets old. peace is what we are seeking. we know one way to find it. i wish that way didn't appear as selfish to everyone else IRL. i know w/o asking that that is the view. and yet it seems selfish to make a person stay who is miserable. if an animal or beloved pet is inujred or ill (beyond endurance), it is put down out of "mercy". why is it not the same for humans? i guess i have to have myself define "endurance".