I can really relate to your racing thoughts. I can also relate to the fact that you say you can't do this anymore. You Can! I say that a lot but I keep going to T. We have hope. If your being threatened you need to find a safe place becasue it is triggering your past. We didn't get here overnight it takes time be easy on yourself. Don't push away the people that are trying to help. I understand your pain and anger so well but don't quit.