I think people think it is OK to "hit back" -- and they do not realize that they are not hitting back at the one that hit them. They don't even remember who that was, sometimes. People can be so wrought up with their own difficulties that they do not think straight. Not much help to the victims, but the world is filled with that sort of thing, it seems to me. Maybe it is up to us who see things more clearly (we think) to change things. Become the change we want to see? Not very easy.