whether it's right or wrong for the therapist to just allow your husband to say forget it, he doesn't want to talk about it, the fact is that you DO want to talk about it, and that can't be ignored. it sounds to me like you had your affairs for really clear reasons (6 years in a sexless marriage!) that need to be addressed. it's almost like a cry for help and here is this therapist shutting you down.

you might need to find another therapist. there's no shortage of them.

i have a sense that physical closeness can sometimes lead to emotional closeness, so there might be something to that homework assignment. but i don't know, it doesn't seem like it will work if you're so angry about not being listened to (which sounds pretty justifiable to me).