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Hi Red;
You have a whole room of friends here, so come sit and tell us more and how we can help.
I know that feeling, like you can't escape from the pain and feelings and that the walls a closing in on you. Know matter how hard you try this feeling just won't go away. But know you are not alone and there is always someone here to help you, so just come in and post or to a chat room and we will be glad to talk with you and hold your hand.
Hugs
cindy
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Today I am going to spend more time looking for all the positive things about myself. Today I recongnize myself and acknowledge myself as a terrific human being.
by of: Time for Joy by Ruth Fishel
Cindy 
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